Is anyone else finding this all incredibly hard to believe? I'm referring to the new TSA airport security screening procedures.
So, from what I can gather, they have recently installed x-ray based "Backscatter" screening equipment in many airports around the country that will display an image of your naked body to someone somewhere (and give you a dose of radiation at the same time). If you refuse to be x-rayed at the airport, then they will subject you to a new pat down technique that many have likened to groping (although to be fair, a friend who flew in the last couple of weeks and was subjected to the new pat down said it was no big deal and nothing like being groped, but she's a mom of 3, not a 16 year old girl with body issues or a sexual assault victim).
I've been thinking that we were going about airport security all wrong ever since the airports reopened after 9/11. We seem to be looking for the thing the terrorist just tried instead of truly trying to prevent the next new thing. But this has now officially gone into the realm of truly crazy. Not only do these new "security measures" seem to be unconstitutional, they just don't make sense! Why are we spending so much money and time trying to make sure grandma doesn't bring more than her allotment of liquids onto the plane?
From this article written back in August of 2006, we have a 1 in 6,500 chance of dying in an auto accident and only a 1 in 400,000 chance of dying in an airplane accident on an annual basis. Even if terrorist were successful in taking down a plane every week, your chance of dying in such an event is only 1 in 135,000.
Then there is the issue of screening pilots. One of the major pilots unions has refused, but I gather TSA isn't very happy about that. But really, why would we be scanning the person flying the airplane for a box cutter or explosives? Wouldn't the pilot, if he or she were determined to take the plane down just take it down? Drug screening I can totally get behind but backscatter or pat downs, just doesn't make any sense.
I do believe that the only ones winning in this game are the terrorists! They do indeed have most of the country terrorized. It is all just so irrational!
Wednesday, November 24, 2010
Saturday, October 16, 2010
Sharing Myself
I got a facebook friend request from someone I don't know and have never heard of today. I know that isn't news. I don't usually accept these requests and I often message them back asking how I know them. Unlike most, they have a link to their fabulous blog on their profile page. And as blog reading often does, lead me to yet another blog where I read this:
This really resonated with me.
If you've been following my blog, you know that I haven't been writing much here. But I feel the need building up as I start to read other blogs again. It was my experience that the blogs I really like to read that get into feelings, values, and personal growth are written by women and that men tended to stick with technology and business and stuff like that. I say was because in the last week, I've run into the most profound blogs written by men. One is Single Dad Laughing (and if you haven't found it already, then I'm guessing you aren't on facebook, because his posts have been shared more than any blog I've ever seen) and the second is where I found the above quote.
Both blogs are values based, and both bloggers post daily. They are both honest about themselves with their readers. I would love to develop the courage to follow their lead. To write about what comes up with honesty (not that I don't already, but I usually choose not to write at all instead of sharing the less than wonderful).
As I move into a new phase of life, with kids growing up and not really wanting me to be as involved in their lives as I have been, I feel drawn to write more about developing my authenticity. To write more about the process and the reactions. We'll see if I truly can revive the ol' blog!
"It seems we never know the ones we love completely. Even though we struggle to do so. In the end, perhaps the best we can do, is to love them completely without that knowing. For years I've tried to bridge the gap with my loved ones by writing in my blog about who I am. By being open and honest about how I think and feel. It did not work!
Though my own goal is to know myself completely and share that knowing with others, my loved ones do not feel the same. What a tragedy! But that is how things are. Even so, I cannot give up on them. I must keep trying.
This really resonated with me.
If you've been following my blog, you know that I haven't been writing much here. But I feel the need building up as I start to read other blogs again. It was my experience that the blogs I really like to read that get into feelings, values, and personal growth are written by women and that men tended to stick with technology and business and stuff like that. I say was because in the last week, I've run into the most profound blogs written by men. One is Single Dad Laughing (and if you haven't found it already, then I'm guessing you aren't on facebook, because his posts have been shared more than any blog I've ever seen) and the second is where I found the above quote.
Both blogs are values based, and both bloggers post daily. They are both honest about themselves with their readers. I would love to develop the courage to follow their lead. To write about what comes up with honesty (not that I don't already, but I usually choose not to write at all instead of sharing the less than wonderful).
As I move into a new phase of life, with kids growing up and not really wanting me to be as involved in their lives as I have been, I feel drawn to write more about developing my authenticity. To write more about the process and the reactions. We'll see if I truly can revive the ol' blog!
Tuesday, August 03, 2010
Is College Worth the Cost?
I just ran across this article, and it seems so much more timely for me now than it did when I saw it several years ago. You see, Bekka is now 18 and she isn't convinced that college is the place for her right now. I'm not convinced either.
She doesn't know what she wants to do - very few 18 year olds really do. For that matter, how many 30, 40, 50... year olds really do either? But is college really that great of a place to figure that out?
I spent 4 years in college, and, while I did come out with a reasonably lucrative career (accounting), it turned out that that wasn't what I wanted to do. I did do it for five years, but I'm pretty sure the cost of four years in college was definitely NOT worth it for my five-year career!
My dad had told us that as long as we graduated from college, he would be there to help us if we ever needed it financially. However, if we didn't graduate from college we were on our own. Besides, everyone I knew was going to college right after high school. It was what you did. You didn't really think about it, you just went. Only losers who worked at K-mart didn't go to school, right?
In general, the smart, ambitious kids went to college - but what if they didn't? What if they went out and traveled the world, started businesses, etc. as James Altucher is suggesting.
Bekka is certainly smart and ambitious - why shouldn't she travel the world, learn about people and more importantly, learn more about herself and how she fits into the world?
She doesn't know what she wants to do - very few 18 year olds really do. For that matter, how many 30, 40, 50... year olds really do either? But is college really that great of a place to figure that out?
I spent 4 years in college, and, while I did come out with a reasonably lucrative career (accounting), it turned out that that wasn't what I wanted to do. I did do it for five years, but I'm pretty sure the cost of four years in college was definitely NOT worth it for my five-year career!
My dad had told us that as long as we graduated from college, he would be there to help us if we ever needed it financially. However, if we didn't graduate from college we were on our own. Besides, everyone I knew was going to college right after high school. It was what you did. You didn't really think about it, you just went. Only losers who worked at K-mart didn't go to school, right?
In general, the smart, ambitious kids went to college - but what if they didn't? What if they went out and traveled the world, started businesses, etc. as James Altucher is suggesting.
Bekka is certainly smart and ambitious - why shouldn't she travel the world, learn about people and more importantly, learn more about herself and how she fits into the world?
Monday, July 26, 2010
I'm THAT Mom
An impromptu blog carnival inspired by Flo.
Most traditional parents, when they hear about unschooling, they think that we are a bunch of neglectful, indulgent parents. Because the media doesn't try to portray the involvement and the connection of the parenting, people just don't get it. What others see as indulgent or neglectful, we see as supporting and trusting.
I'm that mom whose kids don't ask me if their friends can sleep over because it is their house just as much as it is mine, and while I usually ask THEM if it would be convenient for me to have friends over, I don't want them to feel like they need my permission to entertain their friends in their home, even while it is still also my home.
I'm that mom who won't go in my kids' room without their permission, and I'm that mom who has no expectation about the condition in which they keep their rooms.
I'm that mom who takes care of dirty dishes when I see them - who supports my daughter's cooking by trying to keep the kitchen clean enough so that she can easily cook again when she wants to.
Of course I'm that mom who trusts her kids to sleep when they need to and eat what and when they need to, and really, to do what they need to do when they need to do it.
I'm that mom who doesn't have expectations of my kids. Expectations that they need to strive to achieve or fail to meet.
But here's the deal, fellow unschoolers:
I'm also that mom who doesn't have a close relationship with my 18 year old daughter, and continues to hold the space for her to connect with me when SHE wants to. I maintain an open, joyful heart for her for when she wants to be closer. I know that she is doing what she needs to do just as she's always done and I completely trust her and her process. I'm that mom who respects her request to not ask her questions and stay out of her business, no matter how badly I want to be closer. I'm that mom who doesn't go to her dance competitions because she is more comfortable with just her dad there.
And I'm that mom who is trying her hardest to be completely supportive of my 14 year old daughter and her desire to be normal and go to school. The mom who is learning to be excited along with her as she is SO excited to start high school in a few weeks. I'm that mom who holds the space for her to come home any minute, that tells her that there is nothing she has to finish with regard to school, with regard to anything - she is in complete control of how much or how little she wants to partake of her experiences.
I'm that mom - the mom who signed my daughter up for NBTSC for the half she wanted to sign up for, then called and emailed to sign her up for the other half she wanted to add, then cancelled her registration when she no longer wanted to go, without worrying about the non-refundable $100 deposit, even though everyone else thought she should go, including her sister. I'm the mom who told her it was really okay for her to decide that back to school shopping and freshman orientation is more important to her than camp.
Yeah, I'm THAT mom.
Most traditional parents, when they hear about unschooling, they think that we are a bunch of neglectful, indulgent parents. Because the media doesn't try to portray the involvement and the connection of the parenting, people just don't get it. What others see as indulgent or neglectful, we see as supporting and trusting.
I'm that mom whose kids don't ask me if their friends can sleep over because it is their house just as much as it is mine, and while I usually ask THEM if it would be convenient for me to have friends over, I don't want them to feel like they need my permission to entertain their friends in their home, even while it is still also my home.
I'm that mom who won't go in my kids' room without their permission, and I'm that mom who has no expectation about the condition in which they keep their rooms.
I'm that mom who takes care of dirty dishes when I see them - who supports my daughter's cooking by trying to keep the kitchen clean enough so that she can easily cook again when she wants to.
Of course I'm that mom who trusts her kids to sleep when they need to and eat what and when they need to, and really, to do what they need to do when they need to do it.
I'm that mom who doesn't have expectations of my kids. Expectations that they need to strive to achieve or fail to meet.
But here's the deal, fellow unschoolers:
I'm also that mom who doesn't have a close relationship with my 18 year old daughter, and continues to hold the space for her to connect with me when SHE wants to. I maintain an open, joyful heart for her for when she wants to be closer. I know that she is doing what she needs to do just as she's always done and I completely trust her and her process. I'm that mom who respects her request to not ask her questions and stay out of her business, no matter how badly I want to be closer. I'm that mom who doesn't go to her dance competitions because she is more comfortable with just her dad there.
And I'm that mom who is trying her hardest to be completely supportive of my 14 year old daughter and her desire to be normal and go to school. The mom who is learning to be excited along with her as she is SO excited to start high school in a few weeks. I'm that mom who holds the space for her to come home any minute, that tells her that there is nothing she has to finish with regard to school, with regard to anything - she is in complete control of how much or how little she wants to partake of her experiences.
I'm that mom - the mom who signed my daughter up for NBTSC for the half she wanted to sign up for, then called and emailed to sign her up for the other half she wanted to add, then cancelled her registration when she no longer wanted to go, without worrying about the non-refundable $100 deposit, even though everyone else thought she should go, including her sister. I'm the mom who told her it was really okay for her to decide that back to school shopping and freshman orientation is more important to her than camp.
Yeah, I'm THAT mom.
Monday, June 21, 2010
Re-entry into the real world has been a little hurried!
In doing some blog attention (yeah - it's been a while!), I found this post in my drafts that I had started way back in Sept. of '08. Since I really "got nothin" new for anyone, and I enjoyed rereading this account of getting thrown back into the real world after an unschooling conference, I thought I'd go ahead and post it. I'm sure I originally was going to add more (hence the draft status), but more than a year and a half later, I have no idea what it might have been.
The magic of the L&L conference is very strong and hard to describe. The best I can do is mention the energy that propels us back into the real world.
This time, the real world met us quickly in the Atlanta airport. I've never felt that I'm great with other peoples' kids. I love hanging out with and talking with my own kids, but I've always felt uncomfortable with other kids. So it was quite surprising when, while waiting for our plane to Seattle that I would strike up a conversation with the kids sitting near us. After being at L&L for a week, I was just used to talking with anyone and the people nearest me at the airport were kids. So imagine this scene: A 12 year old boy sitting across from me - I ask him if he's going to Seattle or is that just a stop on his way to elsewhere. He starts to answer me, then seems to remember that he's not supposed to talk to strangers. It took me a minute to remember that people actually tell their kids not to talk to strangers!! I smile knowingly at him and ask his mom the same question.
He was the oldest of four kids with a mom who really didn't seem to like any of them very much or think very much of them. The boy had an electronic game to play, and the mom brought coloring book pages and a package of 24 crayons for the four of them that she doled out one at a time for a 4 year old, an 8 year old, an 11 year old and the 12 year old. The crayon box was one of those super cool ones with the sharpener and when the 4 year old started to sharpen one of her new crayons, the mom sharply said, "Don't do that, you're ruining it!" I couldn't help myself and had to ask, "Isn't that what it's for?" Hello! What a stupid thing to ruin your relationship with your kid over - sharpening a crayon with a crayon sharpener!
The 11 year old borrowed Steffi's DS and while she was playing it, the 8 year old started saying that she wanted to play a game. So I asked her if she liked to play tic-tac-toe. No? Okay, well, I have a puzzle book - "Have you ever done a Word Search?" (I know, I know, it's not the most exciting game in the world, but I wasn't exactly prepared to entertain an 8 year old!!) When she said she hadn't, I pulled one out and started to show her how it works. The mom says, "Oh that's way too hard for her, she'll never be able to do that." Totally ignoring the mom, I continue to show her bright daughter how to search for words on a grid. I could tell she was thinking it wasn't the most exciting game in the world, so we moved on to rock, paper, scissors. Now, I don't play rock, paper, scissors like most people do. To make it more fun, you have to get up and do this crazy thing with your feet and try to maintain your balance. She loved it and so did her little sister. We had a good time until they had to check on their seats.
What was really hard, sad, strange, was that these four kids were traveling with their mom and two (youngish) grandparents, and all three adults were totally ignoring these lovely kids except to point out something they were (supposedly) doing wrong! It was just such an abrupt change from being surrounded by wonderful, supported, loved children and their supportive, loving parents and grandparents to be thrown into the ugliness of the real world and traditional parenting.
The magic of the L&L conference is very strong and hard to describe. The best I can do is mention the energy that propels us back into the real world.
This time, the real world met us quickly in the Atlanta airport. I've never felt that I'm great with other peoples' kids. I love hanging out with and talking with my own kids, but I've always felt uncomfortable with other kids. So it was quite surprising when, while waiting for our plane to Seattle that I would strike up a conversation with the kids sitting near us. After being at L&L for a week, I was just used to talking with anyone and the people nearest me at the airport were kids. So imagine this scene: A 12 year old boy sitting across from me - I ask him if he's going to Seattle or is that just a stop on his way to elsewhere. He starts to answer me, then seems to remember that he's not supposed to talk to strangers. It took me a minute to remember that people actually tell their kids not to talk to strangers!! I smile knowingly at him and ask his mom the same question.
He was the oldest of four kids with a mom who really didn't seem to like any of them very much or think very much of them. The boy had an electronic game to play, and the mom brought coloring book pages and a package of 24 crayons for the four of them that she doled out one at a time for a 4 year old, an 8 year old, an 11 year old and the 12 year old. The crayon box was one of those super cool ones with the sharpener and when the 4 year old started to sharpen one of her new crayons, the mom sharply said, "Don't do that, you're ruining it!" I couldn't help myself and had to ask, "Isn't that what it's for?" Hello! What a stupid thing to ruin your relationship with your kid over - sharpening a crayon with a crayon sharpener!
The 11 year old borrowed Steffi's DS and while she was playing it, the 8 year old started saying that she wanted to play a game. So I asked her if she liked to play tic-tac-toe. No? Okay, well, I have a puzzle book - "Have you ever done a Word Search?" (I know, I know, it's not the most exciting game in the world, but I wasn't exactly prepared to entertain an 8 year old!!) When she said she hadn't, I pulled one out and started to show her how it works. The mom says, "Oh that's way too hard for her, she'll never be able to do that." Totally ignoring the mom, I continue to show her bright daughter how to search for words on a grid. I could tell she was thinking it wasn't the most exciting game in the world, so we moved on to rock, paper, scissors. Now, I don't play rock, paper, scissors like most people do. To make it more fun, you have to get up and do this crazy thing with your feet and try to maintain your balance. She loved it and so did her little sister. We had a good time until they had to check on their seats.
What was really hard, sad, strange, was that these four kids were traveling with their mom and two (youngish) grandparents, and all three adults were totally ignoring these lovely kids except to point out something they were (supposedly) doing wrong! It was just such an abrupt change from being surrounded by wonderful, supported, loved children and their supportive, loving parents and grandparents to be thrown into the ugliness of the real world and traditional parenting.
Monday, January 18, 2010
Applause for Hiring the Best Qualified Person!
I wasn't paying attention, I often don't. But while spending some time surfing Facebook I saw that Amanda Simpson has become the first transgendered person to be appointed to a high-level position by Obama. Of course, the right wing contingent is all upset about this, saying really stupid things.
What really blows my mind is this, "Matt Barber, associate dean at Jerry Fallwell's Liberty University, said the appointment "boggles the mind" and said that while African-Americans might deserve special treatment, transgender people don't." I just don't get how hiring this incredibly qualified woman is "special treatment"!
But I'm really excited that the Obama administration has been able to overlook all the crap and just hire the person who is most qualified for the job. They haven't been as speedy as most of us would like on gay rights, but at least they aren't pandering to the right by disqualifying deserving candidates.
What really blows my mind is this, "Matt Barber, associate dean at Jerry Fallwell's Liberty University, said the appointment "boggles the mind" and said that while African-Americans might deserve special treatment, transgender people don't." I just don't get how hiring this incredibly qualified woman is "special treatment"!
But I'm really excited that the Obama administration has been able to overlook all the crap and just hire the person who is most qualified for the job. They haven't been as speedy as most of us would like on gay rights, but at least they aren't pandering to the right by disqualifying deserving candidates.
Sunday, January 10, 2010
Steffi’s Anthropology Project – SCHOOL!
Steffi’s been curious about school for a while now. Last spring she was talking about starting school – that would be eighth grade – in September. “But what about Not Back to School Camp?” I’d ask. “Do you want to miss the two-week Girl Scout trip the second half of September?” “You are planning on being gone all of November, I think they frown on that.” She just didn’t have TIME for school!
In October she went on the Beach Retreat with her church group and the kids there told her how great school was and how much they thought she would like it. Of course, they haven’t ever questioned bigger people telling them what to do all the time - Steffi HATES having anyone else tell her what to do. This seemed to me like a real problem that I wasn’t sure she would deal well with!
The Monday after Thanksgiving she and I stopped by the school, thinking she would try it out in January. The school registrar walked us around the school, pointing out everything relevant to eighth grade. While on tour, she mentioned that they had just started a new term. Hmm, I just figured that they would be starting a new term in January like the Washington schools did back in the day.
Since they had just started, it seemed reasonable for her to try it out as soon as she could rather than waiting until after Christmas with the added bonus that she would have a nice break right away. We spent the rest of the day doing about three years worth of math, then the rest of the week was pretty busy, so we didn’t get back to it until Sunday, the day before she was going to start. I think we ended up getting through about 5/6th grade math. It was so fun for me – to finally understand it. Steffi’s cousins were over on that Sunday and we all sat around working on math – lots of “ah-ha’s” around!
The other thing I did to get her ready to go to school was to talk to her about the possibility of bullies and kids who just aren’t as nice as she is used to. Her response, “Mom, I can be a total bitch if I have to – I’m actually really good at it!” Said with all seriousness. I couldn’t help but laugh!
Oh, and of course supply shopping – that was interesting. It was kind of hard to find everything she was supposed to have in December – the stores just don’t stock it all all year long.
So Steffi went to school two Mondays before Christmas break. After the second day, while working on math homework she said, “this class is really making me lose my love of math.” :-( But she also said that everyone was really nice, teachers, staff, kids. In fact, she said that the kids were just like the kids at camp (Not Back to School Camp), hugging each other and really supportive.
By Thursday, she was wanting a change and said that she would like to go through Monday just to see what coming back from the weekend was like. On Friday she decided to go to Homeschool Central, our homeschool group that meets next door to the school at the Boys & Girls Club, so I walked over to pick her up and signed her out early. As we were talking she asked if she could keep going, but leave after lunch. We stopped in at the registrar’s office and the registrar was just so accommodating. Steffi had an art class second period that she didn’t like (the teacher is the owner at New Morning Bakery, so I’m not too surprised!) and a math class in the afternoon that was too hard, so we were able to move math to second period and she leaves after lunch, just as she wanted! Her schedule is now PE, Algebra, Humanities (two periods), and lunch.
The classes aren’t even close to being as kill and drill as I suspected they would be. In the curriculum guide for the school they talk about incorporating as much hands-on stuff as possible and they do seem to be doing just that. It is definitely NOT real-life, but it sounds like it is a pretty positive environment for what it is.
Steffi is really enjoying it, although she has already decided that she won’t continue after the summer break. Good thing too, I wouldn’t want her to miss NBTSC or anything!
During this whole process, and totally unrelated to the process, I was reading John Taylor Gatto’s “Weapons of Mass Instruction” – great book, but oh so ironic considering Steffi’s current choice of attending school.
In October she went on the Beach Retreat with her church group and the kids there told her how great school was and how much they thought she would like it. Of course, they haven’t ever questioned bigger people telling them what to do all the time - Steffi HATES having anyone else tell her what to do. This seemed to me like a real problem that I wasn’t sure she would deal well with!
The Monday after Thanksgiving she and I stopped by the school, thinking she would try it out in January. The school registrar walked us around the school, pointing out everything relevant to eighth grade. While on tour, she mentioned that they had just started a new term. Hmm, I just figured that they would be starting a new term in January like the Washington schools did back in the day.
Since they had just started, it seemed reasonable for her to try it out as soon as she could rather than waiting until after Christmas with the added bonus that she would have a nice break right away. We spent the rest of the day doing about three years worth of math, then the rest of the week was pretty busy, so we didn’t get back to it until Sunday, the day before she was going to start. I think we ended up getting through about 5/6th grade math. It was so fun for me – to finally understand it. Steffi’s cousins were over on that Sunday and we all sat around working on math – lots of “ah-ha’s” around!
The other thing I did to get her ready to go to school was to talk to her about the possibility of bullies and kids who just aren’t as nice as she is used to. Her response, “Mom, I can be a total bitch if I have to – I’m actually really good at it!” Said with all seriousness. I couldn’t help but laugh!
Oh, and of course supply shopping – that was interesting. It was kind of hard to find everything she was supposed to have in December – the stores just don’t stock it all all year long.
So Steffi went to school two Mondays before Christmas break. After the second day, while working on math homework she said, “this class is really making me lose my love of math.” :-( But she also said that everyone was really nice, teachers, staff, kids. In fact, she said that the kids were just like the kids at camp (Not Back to School Camp), hugging each other and really supportive.
By Thursday, she was wanting a change and said that she would like to go through Monday just to see what coming back from the weekend was like. On Friday she decided to go to Homeschool Central, our homeschool group that meets next door to the school at the Boys & Girls Club, so I walked over to pick her up and signed her out early. As we were talking she asked if she could keep going, but leave after lunch. We stopped in at the registrar’s office and the registrar was just so accommodating. Steffi had an art class second period that she didn’t like (the teacher is the owner at New Morning Bakery, so I’m not too surprised!) and a math class in the afternoon that was too hard, so we were able to move math to second period and she leaves after lunch, just as she wanted! Her schedule is now PE, Algebra, Humanities (two periods), and lunch.
The classes aren’t even close to being as kill and drill as I suspected they would be. In the curriculum guide for the school they talk about incorporating as much hands-on stuff as possible and they do seem to be doing just that. It is definitely NOT real-life, but it sounds like it is a pretty positive environment for what it is.
Steffi is really enjoying it, although she has already decided that she won’t continue after the summer break. Good thing too, I wouldn’t want her to miss NBTSC or anything!
During this whole process, and totally unrelated to the process, I was reading John Taylor Gatto’s “Weapons of Mass Instruction” – great book, but oh so ironic considering Steffi’s current choice of attending school.
Sunday, December 27, 2009
The "Harms" of Homeschooling?
The article, “The Harms of Homeschooling” by Robin L. West is full of discrepancies. The author can’t seem to make up her mind about which generalization she prefers in any one of her many characterizations of homeschoolers. Are we uneducated automatons for the religious right, or over-educated (is there really such a thing?!) suburban housewives? Are our children completely isolated in our homes or an unvaccinated health risk to the community? Are we passionately involved and loving parents, relentlessly authoritarian, abusive, or negligently letting our children skateboard or game their life away? The only thing she seems to be sure of is that we are all mothers, however inaccurate that may be.
Ms. West’s second to last sentence, “Deregulation, however, serves no one’s interests and harms many” seems completely unfounded, given the rest her article. She has no clear evidence of any of the claims she makes, many of them gross exaggerations and characterizations.
It could be that she has taken too much stock in all the HSLDA propaganda, especially their claims at the numbers of homeschoolers they serve.
Her “Harms of Unregulated Homeschooling” are as follows, with my opinion after each:
“First, children who are homeschooled with no state regulation are at greater risk for unreported and unnoticed physical abuse, when they are completely isolated in homes. As the trial judge in In re Rachel noted, “95% of referrals for child abuse come from public school teachers or officials.”
Homeschooling is done, for the most part, by parents who enjoy being with their children. If you don’t enjoy being with your children, the easiest thing to do to get them out of your hair for 7 plus hours each day is to send them off to school. I don’t doubt that 95% of referrals for child abuse come from public school teachers or officials. But it doesn’t logically follow that the other 5% are homeschooled children, as I think the author seems to be trying to infer. Or that there is a large number of families homeschooling to cover up abuse – it’s just not logical.
“Second, there’s a public health risk… deregulated homeschooling means that homeschooled children are basically exempted from immunization requirements.”
This disregards the fact that parents of schooled children can opt out of required immunizations for medical or religious reasons. This also assumes that just because homeschooled children aren’t required to be immunized, their parents don’t think there are good reasons to do so. It’s probable that a larger percentage of homeschooled children are unvaccinated, but it is not accurate to state that all schooled children are vaccinated and all homeschooled children are not. From anecdotal evidence within my circle of acquaintances, more homeschooled children are also home-birthed, breastfed for an extended time, and in general have parents who make informed, albeit alternative, choices. I’m sure there is also a larger percentage of homeschooled children who never, or rarely get sick, due to increased nutrition, adequate sleep, and a stress-free lifestyle.
“Third, public and private schools provide for many children, I suspect, although I have yet to see studies of this, a safe haven in which they are both regarded and respected independently and individually.”
I’m sure this is an accurate statement, and would concede that for many children, whose home lives are less than happy, school is, indeed, a safe haven. In fact, I’ve known some homeschooling families whose children would be better off going to school than being subjected to an unhappy parent barking orders at them all day. However, that applies to less than 1% of all homeschoolers I’ve known.
For the vast majority of school children, school is a stress-filled environment that is not ideal for learning. Many schools are full of bullies (both aggressive and subtle), unhappy and stressed out teachers, noise, and crowds. The author describes for us (several times) the ideal teacher. Unfortunately, not enough children receive the benefit of the ideal teacher. I’ve met some of these wondrous creatures, and, if every school child in the country were under the care of an ideal teacher their entire school career, I’m sure we would see the homeschooling numbers drop significantly. But the sad reality is that ideal teachers are few and far between.
“Fourth, there are political harms. Fundamentalist Protestant adults who were homeschooled over the last thirty years are not politically disengaged, far from it. They vote in far higher percentages than the rest of the population… Their capacity for political action is palpable and admirable, although doubly constrained: it is triggered by a call for action by church leaders, and in substance, it is limited to political action the aim of which is to undermine, limit, or destroy state functions that interfere with family and parental rights.”
It seems oddly sad to me that a law professor would be complaining about citizens exercising their right to vote. It is sadder yet that she would consider this a “harm of homeschooling”. If the purpose of education is to produce citizens, (see Good Citizenship: The Purpose of Education from the Eleanor Roosevelt Papers Project), then how can voting numbers be a harm of homeschooling. I can understand Ms. West’s concern about the number of “religious right” voters who are directed by church leaders rather than their own informed decision, as I share that concern. But I don’t for a minute believe that this is a harm of homeschooling. I believe this is a failure of the left to mobilize an apathetic electorate. Not that I can back this up with anything other than my own knowledge of hundreds of homeschooling families, but left and right, homeschoolers vote. Far and away, homeschoolers are the most politically active people I’ve ever known. It may be true that some of the HSLDA members are mobilized as Ms. West states, by their church leaders, but the homeschoolers I know consider the issues carefully, talk about them with their children and have their children participate, to the extent allowed, in the election process.
I actually find it encouraging, if it is true, that these politically engaged people are acting to protect family and parental rights. I’d be even happier if they were also acting to protect the rights of gays, minorities, children, and everyone else, but I can’t have it all…
The fifth harm is ethical. Ms. West’s argument here is that “Child-raising that is relentlessly authoritarian risks instilling what developmental psychologists call “ethical servility”: a failure to mature morally beyond the recognition of duties of obedience.”
This is assuming that the vast majority of homeschooling parents are patriarchal, heavy-handed, authoritarians, however, this is so far from the truth as to be laughable. Yes, there are a lot of Christian homeschoolers, but the picture Ms. West paints of the typical homeschooler is one I have yet to meet, and I’ve been homeschooling for 11 years in three states and attended numerous local, state, national and international homeschooling events. In that time I’ve met well over 500 homeschooling families and not one of them conforms to the author’s stereotypes. This is not to say that the “relentlessly authoritarian” homeschooler does not exist, but it is far from an over-arching harm of homeschooling.
The healthiest parent/child relationships I know of are homeschoolers. That’s not to say that families whose children are in school don’t have healthy, close relationships, some do. But it is in the homeschooling families where there is a true partnership between parent and child, where the children aren’t treated as children in the typical sense, but as people who sometimes need extra help but also people who know themselves best and what is best for them.
The sixth harm she lists is educational. She gives us the public school as the measure of success, yet the overall success of public school students is nothing any homeschooler I know would wish to mimic. Schools are doing a notoriously poor job of educating our populace, because they were designed to do so. (See the “Weapons of Mass Instruction” by John Taylor Gatto). As many people do, she is confusing the memorization of facts with an education. The majority of homeschoolers want their children to be able to learn on their own and think for themselves. Our test preparation for the standardized tests goes something like, “don’t think about the fact that several of the answers can be correct, or that the actual answer isn’t one of the four choices, just select the one you think a narrow-minded person would think is correct.” The fact that so many people tout the standardized tests as something of value for homeschoolers is laughable. In no way do those test show us the gaps in our children’s educations, we place no stock in the results. We are with our children, exploring the world with them (yes, most of us do leave the house, in fact, most of us are rarely home!), and helping them learn to learn and keep the love of learning they are born with.
I find it funny that she also comments about parents who let their child skateboard or play video games all day. I would love for her to have a real conversation with any one of the fabulous unschooled youth who have been allowed to do whatever they want, whenever they want. I think it would blow her mind just how articulate and engaged these kids are!
Her final harm is economic. Here’s where I certainly am at a loss to follow her logic. She starts off by stating that “the average homeschooling family may have a higher income than the average non-homeschooler, as was recently reported by USA Today.” Then goes on to talk about the “radically fundamentalist” families and concludes with, “These families are not living in romantic, rural, self-sufficient
farmhouses; they are in trailer parks, 1,000- square-foot homes, houses owned by relatives, and some, on tarps in fields or parking lots. Their lack of job skills, passed from one generation to the next, depresses the community’s overall economic health and their state’s tax base.
From what I know of averages, for the average homeschooling family to have a higher income than the average non-homeschooler, it would have to mean that there are very, very few trailer park homeschoolers as a percentage of the whole. When you consider that almost all homeschooling families are single income families, logic would dictate that the trailer park homeschoolers are so small in number as to not be a threat at all. Certainly a higher percentage of non-homeschoolers are double income families, so the economic threat that Ms. West alludes to doesn’t seem to actually be there.
Other bloggers have addressed the inaccuracies in her claims regarding the legality of homeschooling, and done so far better than I ever could here and here.
Throughout the entire article there is a complete lack of citations, footnotes, or other research references. This seems odd to me for a periodical published by a large university. In the article the author is presenting as scholarly fact her unfounded and unresearched opinions of homeschoolers and is trying to get the reader to come to an emotional decision about homeschooling and its need for regulation without actually showing that regulation works (there are plenty of states that regulate homeschoolers, so the data supporting it shouldn’t be that hard to come by if it does work). She seems to have a desire to stereotype homeschoolers as a scary, conservative, politically active, uneducated, unskilled threat to the American way of life. This is so far from any homeschooler I know.
The homeschoolers I know are diverse politically (just from our bumper stickers alone: Ron Paul, Obama, Bush, Pro-Choice, Pro-Life, Gay Rights are equal rights, One man + one woman = marriage, etc. – and that’s just in Corvallis!), religiously (Baptist, Jewish, Catholic, Presbyterian, Unitarian, Atheist, agnostic, pagan, etc.), in our homeschooling style (school at home, eclectic, unschooling, etc.), in our parenting beliefs (attachment parenting, chore charts, consensual, benevolent dictator, democratic, etc.), ethnically, racially, family structure, sexual orientation, and gender identity.
Mostly, we homeschool so that we can provide the best education for our children. We are, for the most part, well educated ourselves and eager to learn alongside our children. We see life as a learning experience and don’t try to separate it out into set aside hours as schools do. It would be impossible to regulate such an education without diluting it and causing a loss of richness. Homeschooled kids are not burnt out. I know very, very few homeschoolers who don’t like to read. They learn to read when they are ready, be that four, six, ten or 12. By the time they are 15, you can’t tell who learned at four and who learned at 12. But with schooled kids, you can tell at 15 who was ready to read at six and who should have been allowed to wait until they were 12, because the ones who should have been allowed to wait hate to read and don’t unless they are required to.
Deregulation of homeschooling benefits us all by providing the world with people who are still curious and eager to learn. Homeschooling is regulated in many states in this country, and there is no difference between the outcomes of homeschooled kids in regulated states vs. unregulated states. We can spend our tax money on things that actually make a difference – there is no need to spend it on regulating homeschoolers!
Ms. West’s second to last sentence, “Deregulation, however, serves no one’s interests and harms many” seems completely unfounded, given the rest her article. She has no clear evidence of any of the claims she makes, many of them gross exaggerations and characterizations.
It could be that she has taken too much stock in all the HSLDA propaganda, especially their claims at the numbers of homeschoolers they serve.
Her “Harms of Unregulated Homeschooling” are as follows, with my opinion after each:
“First, children who are homeschooled with no state regulation are at greater risk for unreported and unnoticed physical abuse, when they are completely isolated in homes. As the trial judge in In re Rachel noted, “95% of referrals for child abuse come from public school teachers or officials.”
Homeschooling is done, for the most part, by parents who enjoy being with their children. If you don’t enjoy being with your children, the easiest thing to do to get them out of your hair for 7 plus hours each day is to send them off to school. I don’t doubt that 95% of referrals for child abuse come from public school teachers or officials. But it doesn’t logically follow that the other 5% are homeschooled children, as I think the author seems to be trying to infer. Or that there is a large number of families homeschooling to cover up abuse – it’s just not logical.
“Second, there’s a public health risk… deregulated homeschooling means that homeschooled children are basically exempted from immunization requirements.”
This disregards the fact that parents of schooled children can opt out of required immunizations for medical or religious reasons. This also assumes that just because homeschooled children aren’t required to be immunized, their parents don’t think there are good reasons to do so. It’s probable that a larger percentage of homeschooled children are unvaccinated, but it is not accurate to state that all schooled children are vaccinated and all homeschooled children are not. From anecdotal evidence within my circle of acquaintances, more homeschooled children are also home-birthed, breastfed for an extended time, and in general have parents who make informed, albeit alternative, choices. I’m sure there is also a larger percentage of homeschooled children who never, or rarely get sick, due to increased nutrition, adequate sleep, and a stress-free lifestyle.
“Third, public and private schools provide for many children, I suspect, although I have yet to see studies of this, a safe haven in which they are both regarded and respected independently and individually.”
I’m sure this is an accurate statement, and would concede that for many children, whose home lives are less than happy, school is, indeed, a safe haven. In fact, I’ve known some homeschooling families whose children would be better off going to school than being subjected to an unhappy parent barking orders at them all day. However, that applies to less than 1% of all homeschoolers I’ve known.
For the vast majority of school children, school is a stress-filled environment that is not ideal for learning. Many schools are full of bullies (both aggressive and subtle), unhappy and stressed out teachers, noise, and crowds. The author describes for us (several times) the ideal teacher. Unfortunately, not enough children receive the benefit of the ideal teacher. I’ve met some of these wondrous creatures, and, if every school child in the country were under the care of an ideal teacher their entire school career, I’m sure we would see the homeschooling numbers drop significantly. But the sad reality is that ideal teachers are few and far between.
“Fourth, there are political harms. Fundamentalist Protestant adults who were homeschooled over the last thirty years are not politically disengaged, far from it. They vote in far higher percentages than the rest of the population… Their capacity for political action is palpable and admirable, although doubly constrained: it is triggered by a call for action by church leaders, and in substance, it is limited to political action the aim of which is to undermine, limit, or destroy state functions that interfere with family and parental rights.”
It seems oddly sad to me that a law professor would be complaining about citizens exercising their right to vote. It is sadder yet that she would consider this a “harm of homeschooling”. If the purpose of education is to produce citizens, (see Good Citizenship: The Purpose of Education from the Eleanor Roosevelt Papers Project), then how can voting numbers be a harm of homeschooling. I can understand Ms. West’s concern about the number of “religious right” voters who are directed by church leaders rather than their own informed decision, as I share that concern. But I don’t for a minute believe that this is a harm of homeschooling. I believe this is a failure of the left to mobilize an apathetic electorate. Not that I can back this up with anything other than my own knowledge of hundreds of homeschooling families, but left and right, homeschoolers vote. Far and away, homeschoolers are the most politically active people I’ve ever known. It may be true that some of the HSLDA members are mobilized as Ms. West states, by their church leaders, but the homeschoolers I know consider the issues carefully, talk about them with their children and have their children participate, to the extent allowed, in the election process.
I actually find it encouraging, if it is true, that these politically engaged people are acting to protect family and parental rights. I’d be even happier if they were also acting to protect the rights of gays, minorities, children, and everyone else, but I can’t have it all…
The fifth harm is ethical. Ms. West’s argument here is that “Child-raising that is relentlessly authoritarian risks instilling what developmental psychologists call “ethical servility”: a failure to mature morally beyond the recognition of duties of obedience.”
This is assuming that the vast majority of homeschooling parents are patriarchal, heavy-handed, authoritarians, however, this is so far from the truth as to be laughable. Yes, there are a lot of Christian homeschoolers, but the picture Ms. West paints of the typical homeschooler is one I have yet to meet, and I’ve been homeschooling for 11 years in three states and attended numerous local, state, national and international homeschooling events. In that time I’ve met well over 500 homeschooling families and not one of them conforms to the author’s stereotypes. This is not to say that the “relentlessly authoritarian” homeschooler does not exist, but it is far from an over-arching harm of homeschooling.
The healthiest parent/child relationships I know of are homeschoolers. That’s not to say that families whose children are in school don’t have healthy, close relationships, some do. But it is in the homeschooling families where there is a true partnership between parent and child, where the children aren’t treated as children in the typical sense, but as people who sometimes need extra help but also people who know themselves best and what is best for them.
The sixth harm she lists is educational. She gives us the public school as the measure of success, yet the overall success of public school students is nothing any homeschooler I know would wish to mimic. Schools are doing a notoriously poor job of educating our populace, because they were designed to do so. (See the “Weapons of Mass Instruction” by John Taylor Gatto). As many people do, she is confusing the memorization of facts with an education. The majority of homeschoolers want their children to be able to learn on their own and think for themselves. Our test preparation for the standardized tests goes something like, “don’t think about the fact that several of the answers can be correct, or that the actual answer isn’t one of the four choices, just select the one you think a narrow-minded person would think is correct.” The fact that so many people tout the standardized tests as something of value for homeschoolers is laughable. In no way do those test show us the gaps in our children’s educations, we place no stock in the results. We are with our children, exploring the world with them (yes, most of us do leave the house, in fact, most of us are rarely home!), and helping them learn to learn and keep the love of learning they are born with.
I find it funny that she also comments about parents who let their child skateboard or play video games all day. I would love for her to have a real conversation with any one of the fabulous unschooled youth who have been allowed to do whatever they want, whenever they want. I think it would blow her mind just how articulate and engaged these kids are!
Her final harm is economic. Here’s where I certainly am at a loss to follow her logic. She starts off by stating that “the average homeschooling family may have a higher income than the average non-homeschooler, as was recently reported by USA Today.” Then goes on to talk about the “radically fundamentalist” families and concludes with, “These families are not living in romantic, rural, self-sufficient
farmhouses; they are in trailer parks, 1,000- square-foot homes, houses owned by relatives, and some, on tarps in fields or parking lots. Their lack of job skills, passed from one generation to the next, depresses the community’s overall economic health and their state’s tax base.
From what I know of averages, for the average homeschooling family to have a higher income than the average non-homeschooler, it would have to mean that there are very, very few trailer park homeschoolers as a percentage of the whole. When you consider that almost all homeschooling families are single income families, logic would dictate that the trailer park homeschoolers are so small in number as to not be a threat at all. Certainly a higher percentage of non-homeschoolers are double income families, so the economic threat that Ms. West alludes to doesn’t seem to actually be there.
Other bloggers have addressed the inaccuracies in her claims regarding the legality of homeschooling, and done so far better than I ever could here and here.
Throughout the entire article there is a complete lack of citations, footnotes, or other research references. This seems odd to me for a periodical published by a large university. In the article the author is presenting as scholarly fact her unfounded and unresearched opinions of homeschoolers and is trying to get the reader to come to an emotional decision about homeschooling and its need for regulation without actually showing that regulation works (there are plenty of states that regulate homeschoolers, so the data supporting it shouldn’t be that hard to come by if it does work). She seems to have a desire to stereotype homeschoolers as a scary, conservative, politically active, uneducated, unskilled threat to the American way of life. This is so far from any homeschooler I know.
The homeschoolers I know are diverse politically (just from our bumper stickers alone: Ron Paul, Obama, Bush, Pro-Choice, Pro-Life, Gay Rights are equal rights, One man + one woman = marriage, etc. – and that’s just in Corvallis!), religiously (Baptist, Jewish, Catholic, Presbyterian, Unitarian, Atheist, agnostic, pagan, etc.), in our homeschooling style (school at home, eclectic, unschooling, etc.), in our parenting beliefs (attachment parenting, chore charts, consensual, benevolent dictator, democratic, etc.), ethnically, racially, family structure, sexual orientation, and gender identity.
Mostly, we homeschool so that we can provide the best education for our children. We are, for the most part, well educated ourselves and eager to learn alongside our children. We see life as a learning experience and don’t try to separate it out into set aside hours as schools do. It would be impossible to regulate such an education without diluting it and causing a loss of richness. Homeschooled kids are not burnt out. I know very, very few homeschoolers who don’t like to read. They learn to read when they are ready, be that four, six, ten or 12. By the time they are 15, you can’t tell who learned at four and who learned at 12. But with schooled kids, you can tell at 15 who was ready to read at six and who should have been allowed to wait until they were 12, because the ones who should have been allowed to wait hate to read and don’t unless they are required to.
Deregulation of homeschooling benefits us all by providing the world with people who are still curious and eager to learn. Homeschooling is regulated in many states in this country, and there is no difference between the outcomes of homeschooled kids in regulated states vs. unregulated states. We can spend our tax money on things that actually make a difference – there is no need to spend it on regulating homeschoolers!
Tuesday, November 24, 2009
I'm Grateful for Busyness
Wow! What a week!
Monday the 16th I worked on cleaning and sewing as well as getting my teeth cleaned and having a lunch meeting with the Boys & Girls Club clubhouse director. I'm thankful to have found the most fun dental hygienist ever! And I'm thankful that the Boys & Girls Club hires such great staff - so easy to work with.
Tuesday I finished Bekka's solo dress modifications and Steve came home. Thankful for the ability to sew well - thanks, Mom!
Wednesday Bekka had class here in Corvallis. We were going to leave for Portland at 3:00 so she could go to open studio, but just as we were walking out the door, found out that she was needed to teach (I thought she had checked the day before!) - so that day I was very thankful for the ability to be flexible. We moved the floor covering they had been using for hard shoe practice to the Corvallis Dance Center where the Adv. Beg. and Novice class is held, then back again to where the Prizewinner/Champ class is held, then over to our house where it will be stored over the break. THEN we left for Portland.
Thursday we flew to Denver for the Western Regional Oireachtas!!! Steve and I got to tour the Mint at the last minute, which as interesting. Very thankful that our flight was not affected by the computer glitch that delayed most of the day's flights. I'm also thankful for the friendly TSA staff at PDX - they are so great! And I'm thankful that Annamanda found the Crown Plaza - just two blocks from the convention center and two blocks from great, easy, food - the Corner Bakery Cafe and the Cooks' Choice Market, where I ate most of my meals.
Friday was the under's competition. We pretty much just got to hang out. Then Friday night was teams practice. The pressure was really on for our coach. I'm grateful for our amazing team kids who just let it all roll off their backs. I crazily volunteered to PAINT one of the men's competition vest! Yikes! I'm grateful for a steady hand and not messing it up. He loved it, thank goodness.
Saturday was teams. Bekka wasn't up for a while so we got to sleep in. They looked so great! Her ceile' recalled and placed tenth and her figure choreography took second (out of only two, but they were very good - wish there had been other teams). Our school's dance drama is the talk of the message boards - "Risque!" "Scandalis!" Our teacher is very pleased! It was a great show, even though there were several wardrobe malfunctions. I'm grateful for this crazy pseudo-family that we've come into through Irish Dance. These are just amazing people. Our school really is just so great.
Sunday was Bekka's solo competition. Her's was first thing - 8:00am. She had to be there and ready by 7:00. Her dress looked great and she danced well. The judges weren't as impressed and we were, and placed her third from last, but for a prizewinner, I thought she did great! We all went to the awards ceremony where we cheered for Allie, Tim, John, and Alex, our World Qualifiers, and for Nikki, who once again was one place away from WQ. After the ceremony we all went to the Spaghetti Factory - what a fun night! So thankful for the GREAT attitude of ALL our dancers - they are just SO AWESOME!
Monday we got up and went to the airport. A day of traveling and getting home. Steffi, her cousin Andria, and Steve's folks were already home when we got here. I'm thankful that I set up the in-law's room (which is really my room, but I'm the first to give up a room for guests) before we left.
Today I mostly finished cleaning the house. I have two bathrooms left. So grateful for my Plan HC friends, who I met with this afternoon and having a clean dining room. Yea!
Monday the 16th I worked on cleaning and sewing as well as getting my teeth cleaned and having a lunch meeting with the Boys & Girls Club clubhouse director. I'm thankful to have found the most fun dental hygienist ever! And I'm thankful that the Boys & Girls Club hires such great staff - so easy to work with.
Tuesday I finished Bekka's solo dress modifications and Steve came home. Thankful for the ability to sew well - thanks, Mom!
Wednesday Bekka had class here in Corvallis. We were going to leave for Portland at 3:00 so she could go to open studio, but just as we were walking out the door, found out that she was needed to teach (I thought she had checked the day before!) - so that day I was very thankful for the ability to be flexible. We moved the floor covering they had been using for hard shoe practice to the Corvallis Dance Center where the Adv. Beg. and Novice class is held, then back again to where the Prizewinner/Champ class is held, then over to our house where it will be stored over the break. THEN we left for Portland.
Thursday we flew to Denver for the Western Regional Oireachtas!!! Steve and I got to tour the Mint at the last minute, which as interesting. Very thankful that our flight was not affected by the computer glitch that delayed most of the day's flights. I'm also thankful for the friendly TSA staff at PDX - they are so great! And I'm thankful that Annamanda found the Crown Plaza - just two blocks from the convention center and two blocks from great, easy, food - the Corner Bakery Cafe and the Cooks' Choice Market, where I ate most of my meals.
Friday was the under's competition. We pretty much just got to hang out. Then Friday night was teams practice. The pressure was really on for our coach. I'm grateful for our amazing team kids who just let it all roll off their backs. I crazily volunteered to PAINT one of the men's competition vest! Yikes! I'm grateful for a steady hand and not messing it up. He loved it, thank goodness.
Saturday was teams. Bekka wasn't up for a while so we got to sleep in. They looked so great! Her ceile' recalled and placed tenth and her figure choreography took second (out of only two, but they were very good - wish there had been other teams). Our school's dance drama is the talk of the message boards - "Risque!" "Scandalis!" Our teacher is very pleased! It was a great show, even though there were several wardrobe malfunctions. I'm grateful for this crazy pseudo-family that we've come into through Irish Dance. These are just amazing people. Our school really is just so great.
Sunday was Bekka's solo competition. Her's was first thing - 8:00am. She had to be there and ready by 7:00. Her dress looked great and she danced well. The judges weren't as impressed and we were, and placed her third from last, but for a prizewinner, I thought she did great! We all went to the awards ceremony where we cheered for Allie, Tim, John, and Alex, our World Qualifiers, and for Nikki, who once again was one place away from WQ. After the ceremony we all went to the Spaghetti Factory - what a fun night! So thankful for the GREAT attitude of ALL our dancers - they are just SO AWESOME!
Monday we got up and went to the airport. A day of traveling and getting home. Steffi, her cousin Andria, and Steve's folks were already home when we got here. I'm thankful that I set up the in-law's room (which is really my room, but I'm the first to give up a room for guests) before we left.
Today I mostly finished cleaning the house. I have two bathrooms left. So grateful for my Plan HC friends, who I met with this afternoon and having a clean dining room. Yea!
Sunday, November 15, 2009
I'm Grateful For: Clean Rooms
Since I had the house all to myself most of the day, I finally got around to cleaning Steffi's room. She is on her annual trek to south Texas to visit with Steve's folks and when she returns our house will be full of family for Thanksgiving, so before she left I asked if I could clean her room.
It's just so nice to get one room totally clean every once in a while!
It's just so nice to get one room totally clean every once in a while!
Saturday, November 14, 2009
I'm Grateful for: Trader Joe's and Honest People
After participating in and giving part of the Service Unit Cookie Manager Training in Eugene, I headed over to Trader Joe's. I LOVE TJ's and I especially love going by myself when I can really look at what's in stock.
But after a full day of training, my brain felt completely full of noodles! I spent some time picking out some new beer varieties, then I left it in the bottom of the cart and drove off. Once I got on the Delta Hwy I realized that not only had I left the beer, but that I had also forgotten that I was going to stop by Costco and get gas. Yikes - I used to be fairly sharp, hardly forgetting anything, but I'm starting to worry about my memory lately.
Since I had to go back by TJ's anyway, I stopped to see if some kind person had turned it in and sure enough - I didn't even have to finish my question before they were saying "yes, they had it". Yea!
But after a full day of training, my brain felt completely full of noodles! I spent some time picking out some new beer varieties, then I left it in the bottom of the cart and drove off. Once I got on the Delta Hwy I realized that not only had I left the beer, but that I had also forgotten that I was going to stop by Costco and get gas. Yikes - I used to be fairly sharp, hardly forgetting anything, but I'm starting to worry about my memory lately.
Since I had to go back by TJ's anyway, I stopped to see if some kind person had turned it in and sure enough - I didn't even have to finish my question before they were saying "yes, they had it". Yea!
Friday, November 13, 2009
I'm Grateful For: Naps!
Bekka and I went to Homeschool Central at the Boys & Girls Club this morning for our occasional swap. By the time we dropped off the extra stuff to Vina Moses, got home and got lunch I had a terrible headache.
I love that I have the freedom to take a long, healing nap in the middle of the afternoon!
I love that I have the freedom to take a long, healing nap in the middle of the afternoon!
Thursday, November 12, 2009
I'm Grateful For: Update Posts
It is already Thursday - well six minutes until Friday and I haven't posted since Monday.
So here's a list of things I'm thankful for this week:
My ability to figure things out
My rolled hem presser foot
Incredible musicians - have you seen Once?
Fabric Depot in Portland (wish it were much closer, but still...)
The Corvallis advanced dancers who routinely go up to Portland: Colleen, Tim, Sierra, and Maddie - you guys make the drive so entertaining! "It's 43 degrees and we're headed North." "Ya' big dummy." "Northwest!" "North!" All together now...
So here's a list of things I'm thankful for this week:
My ability to figure things out
My rolled hem presser foot
Incredible musicians - have you seen Once?
Fabric Depot in Portland (wish it were much closer, but still...)
The Corvallis advanced dancers who routinely go up to Portland: Colleen, Tim, Sierra, and Maddie - you guys make the drive so entertaining! "It's 43 degrees and we're headed North." "Ya' big dummy." "Northwest!" "North!" All together now...
Monday, November 09, 2009
I'm Grateful For: Cats Who Love Too Much
We are down to two indoor cats (and one outdoor cat - no cats cross the threshold!), and they are so far from aloof it is often annoying, but I love it as well.
Lyra is just so entirely in love with me that she can't bear to be away from me. And if she has been, and we are reunited, she kneads, and purrs and rubs her face on mine. When I come home, she is at the door to greet me - begging to be lifted to my shoulder (so she can rub on my face). She loves the rest of the family, too, but I seem to be the recipient of most of her affections.
She wasn't always like this, but the last several months, she has been getting steadily more dependent on me emotionally. I'm starting to wonder where it will end! As I write this, she is laying on me - staking her claim to her spot for the night.
Tamwyn, our other indoor cat, is crying at me from the floor because she beat him to the coveted spot. Now, if he is up and she comes along she'll jump on up and reestablish her claim. He's not entirely keen on her, so he'll jump off quite quickly and concede the spot. But if she beat him to it, he'll give up and go away, waiting for another (rare and getting rarer) time when she isn't on me.
Most cats really aren't lap cats - and I feel so fortunate to have two who practically fight over the honor!
Lyra is just so entirely in love with me that she can't bear to be away from me. And if she has been, and we are reunited, she kneads, and purrs and rubs her face on mine. When I come home, she is at the door to greet me - begging to be lifted to my shoulder (so she can rub on my face). She loves the rest of the family, too, but I seem to be the recipient of most of her affections.
She wasn't always like this, but the last several months, she has been getting steadily more dependent on me emotionally. I'm starting to wonder where it will end! As I write this, she is laying on me - staking her claim to her spot for the night.
Tamwyn, our other indoor cat, is crying at me from the floor because she beat him to the coveted spot. Now, if he is up and she comes along she'll jump on up and reestablish her claim. He's not entirely keen on her, so he'll jump off quite quickly and concede the spot. But if she beat him to it, he'll give up and go away, waiting for another (rare and getting rarer) time when she isn't on me.
Most cats really aren't lap cats - and I feel so fortunate to have two who practically fight over the honor!
Sunday, November 08, 2009
I'm Grateful For: Dedicated Dance Teachers
With less than two weeks until Oireachtas (the Regional Championships), I think Jim and Lauren are now spending more time with our kids than with their own! They give the dancers everything they've got! They are generous, fun loving, kind, hard, and oh-so-dedicated to the entire An Daire family.
Saturday, November 07, 2009
I'm Grateful For: Fabulous Friends & Birthdays
Today is my fabulous friend, Dominique's birthday. I feel so fortunate to be able to help her celebrate. She is one of the most beautiful people I know, shining brightly and peacefully from the inside.I made a cake for her last night, got a bouquet of flowers, a bottle of wine and some other treats on the way over and we enjoyed fresh homemade hummus, pita bread, 3P soup (my personal favorite), rosemary bread, a wonderful salad, and conversation late into the night.
Friday, November 06, 2009
I'm Grateful For: Fun Shoes
Mostly because as soon as I got these shoes I wanted to post a photo of them. They make me smile to look at them. The girls don't like 'em, but my friends and I do - must be a generational thing.
Thursday, November 05, 2009
I'm Grateful For: Slow Start Mornings and Interesting People
This morning I had "laptop in bed" and didn't get up until well after 10:30. I just love it when I have a little extra time to poke around and explore what's out there.
While checking my email I found a great blog that I am thankful for by a couple in Dallas, OR who are trying to reduce the amount of landfill-bound garbage they produce in one year to less than a shoebox with a few, well thought out exceptions.
This afternoon I drive Bekka and a few other dancers up to Portland to prepare for Oireachtas (the Irish Dance Regional Championships). The forecast says rain, so I'll also be grateful that Steve and Steffi are off in TX with the Prius, causing me to have to take the Sequoia up.
While checking my email I found a great blog that I am thankful for by a couple in Dallas, OR who are trying to reduce the amount of landfill-bound garbage they produce in one year to less than a shoebox with a few, well thought out exceptions.
This afternoon I drive Bekka and a few other dancers up to Portland to prepare for Oireachtas (the Irish Dance Regional Championships). The forecast says rain, so I'll also be grateful that Steve and Steffi are off in TX with the Prius, causing me to have to take the Sequoia up.
Wednesday, November 04, 2009
November - a Month of Gratitude
Today on my monthly GUTS call, Reggie asked us what we are going to focus on this month with regard to gratitude.
I said that I will notice. I will notice the small and the large things around me, for simply to notice (without judgment) is to be grateful.
I am already grateful for a couple of reminders from several fellow GUTS girls: viewing everything, even those things we don't like, with an attitude of gratitude; focusing on letting go of expectations; and daily journaling.
This reminded me of a daily blogging exercise, which I haven't done in such a long time. In fact, as I logged in, I noticed that I hadn't blogged at all since August! BTW, the Julie & Julia movie and post-movie discussion at Big River was so GREAT! So, for the rest of the month of November, I will try to post a gratitude or two each and every day.
I will start by backdating what I've been grateful for the first three days of the month...
I said that I will notice. I will notice the small and the large things around me, for simply to notice (without judgment) is to be grateful.
I am already grateful for a couple of reminders from several fellow GUTS girls: viewing everything, even those things we don't like, with an attitude of gratitude; focusing on letting go of expectations; and daily journaling.
This reminded me of a daily blogging exercise, which I haven't done in such a long time. In fact, as I logged in, I noticed that I hadn't blogged at all since August! BTW, the Julie & Julia movie and post-movie discussion at Big River was so GREAT! So, for the rest of the month of November, I will try to post a gratitude or two each and every day.
I will start by backdating what I've been grateful for the first three days of the month...
Tuesday, November 03, 2009
I'm Grateful for: Clients who turn into friends
Today I ran into my best client and her daughter at Borders. They were on their way to a quick dinner and a Tech Smartz meeting and allowed me to invite myself along. I really enjoyed talking with them both at dinner and freezing and recapping the meeting in the parking lot after.
I am also grateful for my very understanding friends on the Plan HC committee. When I called just as the meeting was to start to tell them that I had forgotten (after completely forgetting a GS leader meeting the night before - Yikes!), they were just so great about it.
And I'm grateful for the technology available to chat with an absent member of the committee while the rest of us met live.
I am also grateful for my very understanding friends on the Plan HC committee. When I called just as the meeting was to start to tell them that I had forgotten (after completely forgetting a GS leader meeting the night before - Yikes!), they were just so great about it.
And I'm grateful for the technology available to chat with an absent member of the committee while the rest of us met live.
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